You will never be Forgotten

Sorry it has been awhile but unfortunately life has been crazy and not good crazy. On Thursday March 5, one of my very best friends, Chris Sligar passed away from a heart attack at age 30. I can't believe he's gone. I had to fly home to New York for the weekend so I could attend the calling hours and funeral. I had to say my goodbye. Getting off the plane in Syracuse was very hard because I knew why I was there, to bury one of my best friends. I never thought in a million years that I would have to go through again. As most of you may know, my friend Brandon was killed in a car accident last June. But this time, it felt much different. Even though Brandon was my friend, he was closer to my friend Zach so I felt pain but nothing like I felt when I heard Chris had died. Now I can honestly say that I know exactly how Zach felt. On Sunday, I went to the calling hours and there were at least 2 blocks of people waiting outside the funeral home to get in and even more waiting once inside. I was fortunate to see Chris's cousin, Tammy and she took me to Joe. I collapsed in his arms crying because at that moment, it hit me that Chris was gone. Joe was able to get me up to the front of line to the Sligar family. But first, I knelt in front of Chris in his casket and said my goodbye. I spoke with his parents and his 3 brothers and 2 sisters. Each one of them told me how much Chris had loved me. I even had a cousin whom I had never met ask if I was Sara, she knew who I was because of Chris talking about me. I didn't realize how much he talked about me or how much he loved me.

The funeral was the worst experience of my life. When they wheeled the casket in with his family behind him, I lost it. I did not want to say goodbye to him. The funeral was 2 hours long and I cried the entire time. My mom had to hold me up at some points, otherwise I would have collapsed into hysterics. It was even worse at the end seeing his casket put into the hearse. I was very thankful to have my parents by my side the entire time and good friends as well. There was a get together after the funeral and I went there with 2 friends and we ate and reminisced. His family even gave me some pictures to me us Chris and I. His mom told me before I left that she would love for me to come visit when I am home again, she does not want us to lose touch. I will be sure that never happens.

Chris-I know you are probably reading this up there in Heaven. I want you to know that you were one of my best friends and I loved you very much. I honestly can' t imagine my life without you. I feel as though you took a piece of my heart with you to Heaven. I want it back when its my turn!!!! My first trip to New York is going to be difficult, I can't imagine it right now, it still hurts too much. I did promise your parents that I would come visit and I will. I also told Elizabeth we could hang out too, even though it won't be the same. She took this the hardest and I am going to try my hardest to help her through this. I am going to do my best to keep your memory alive. I only wish you knew how much you were loved by so many people. I will never forget all of our fun times in Oswego or in Carthage. Thank you for being such a great friend and now I know I have an angel watching over me in Heaven. Rest in Peace my friend. "Remembering you will be easy, I will do it everyday, but the ache in my heart will never fade away". I love you and don't you forget it!!

Typical face of Chris Sligar

Old pic of Chris

Chris and I in Oswego-Aug.08

Welcome baby Hayley!

I want to welcome Hayley Barbara Herr to the world! My very good friend, Liza gave birth to her second child, a daughter on Monday March 2. Liza was certain it was a boy but I have thought it was a girl from day 1. I guess I was right...! I would have more surprised if she had called and told me it was a boy! I am very happy for her and her husband, Jason and their son Gabe. I had the honor of going and meeting Hayley for the first time last night. She is absolutely perfect and I can't wait to watch her grow! Congrats Herr Family!!!!

Hayley- so alert!

Sleeping:)

Me holding Hayley

First time for everything

Yesterday, I had a 'first'. I was pulled over for the very first time since I got my driver's license 12 years ago! I was meeting my friend, Meda for lunch at Sweet Tomatoes (also a first!) and I ran into PetSmart quickly to check if they had something. I have been in this shopping center many times but I was coming from a different direction that I normally come. I went to turn into Sweet Tomatoes and realized too late that I was turning in the exit. And of course a cop was trying to come out!! I backed up and went into the right entrance and parked and of course he out his lights on and asked to see my driver's license. It was cold and pouring rain so he looked at it real quick and I explained that I had never been there and was not familiar with layout. He said I knew what I did wrong and let me go...phew!!! The last thing I need right now is a ticket and having to go to court. So I learned my lesson. What is up with those tiny medians and having you only being able go in and out one way? Its annoying!!!!

On the other hand, I received my cap and gown in the mail on Thursday and it hit me that I am graduating in 2 months!! Wow! I can't wait to put on that cap and gown on May 8th and receive my Master's degree!!!!!!

Sad day

I found out this morning that my great uncle who was a soldier in The Wizard of Oz, died late last night. This has really affected me but I met him numerous times and he looked and acted exactly like my grandpa who died a few months before my parents got married. I feel as though I lost my grandpa again. I feel blessed to have known him and in a way know my grandpa too, since they were so much alike. But it makes me feel better to know he is no longer suffering and in Heaven partying with my grandparents!!

My great uncle Clarence as a soldier in the Wizard of Oz

Uncle Clarence and Aunt Myrna

On a side note, it has been a stressful and draining week. The kids that I nanny are still sick from last week which means lots of crying and whining. Thankfully they are both starting to feel better, otherwise, I might have lost my mind. My sister told me her mother in law, who has pancreatic cancer is not doing good. I have been really watching what I eat and trying to exercise a little but more since bathing suit season is right around the corner. Yesterday morning I felt like a blob and was at my lowest weight and today I felt skinnier and was a pound more!!! What in the world is up with that?? Oh well, I know the weight doesn't matter, its how you feel and your clothes fit but still! Better luck next week!

MIA

Sorry if I have been MIA lately. Life has been busy but I guess that is nothing new. School is moving along. I cannot wait for it to be over!!! Only 8 weeks left! I have spring break March 9-13 and I cannot wait to have a break from doing school work, it would be nice to have an internship and work break too but that is not possible. I will take what I can get. Some daysI feel as though it should be later than February 24 and other times I feel its only early February. Thank goodness, February went fast and I am hoping March and April go by even faster. I do not remember feeling like this during my last semester at Oswego. Maybe because when I wasn't in class or at work, I was partying! I am taking a day at a time and keep telling myself that I will not feel this tired and stressed forever. ONLY 73 DAYS until GRADUATION (I'm not counting or anything)!!!!!

2:27:39

That is how long it took me to finish the Dasani Half Marathon in Myrtle Beach. I called it my own personal St. Valentines' Day Massacre! Overall, it was a great race. The weather was almost perfect. It was cloudy and about 48-50 degrees. I would have preferred it be about 10 degrees cooler but you have to take what you get. There was a 70% chance of rain but it held off until after I was finished...thank god! The course was completely flat and was a 13 mile loop around Myrtle Beach and part of it was by the beach. It was better than Kiawah because Kiawah was not a loop, it was running 6.5 miles and then turning around and going back, very boring.

Before the race was a different story. I had a mini meltdown at the start line about 5 minutes before the gun went off. I panicked because I had not trained as well as I should have and I was NOT prepared to run 13.1 miles. My sister gave me a big hug and gave some words of encouragement. She told me to take my time and to walk if I had to. She also told me that it took courage to get out there and run when I have not run more than 3-5 miles since Thanksgiving because of my injury. And she was right, I could do it and I did. I did not walk and honestly that was not an option for me once I started because physically I knew it would be a challenge and I knew I had to get there mentally and I did. The first mile I kept telling myself I could do this and it was confirmed at mile 3 when Step by Step by NKOTB came on my ipod! There were drink stations every 2 miles so I broke the race down into 2 mile increments. Before I knew it, I was crossing the finish line! By then, I was glad to be done. I felt great until mile 9 and the next mile seemed to last forever. My legs were starting to ache and I soaked in sweat. Miles 10 and 11 were a bit better, my legs and feet were numb at this point. I hit the last drink station at mile 12 and then it hit me I only had ONE mile to go. I started to pick up my pace because I knew I would get to the finish line quicker and I just wanted to be done.

I am very proud of this accomplishment. I know I wasn't as prepared as I was for Kiawah, but I only added 5 minutes to my time fro Kiawah which is awesome considering how hard I trained for Kiawah and injury prevented me from training as hard for Myrtle Beach. I think my sister and I are going to make this an annual race for us. I can't wait until next year because I am going to beat my best time of 2:22:23 and get under a 10 minute mile pace. Watch out Myrtle Beach, I am going to kick your ass next year!

Today I am very sore. My legs were sore yesterday but I did stretch and get into the hot tub yesterday afternoon. My feet started to swell last night so I elevated them and they were better this morning. I could barely touch my toes this morning and after being in the car for 3 hours, I could barely get out. I worked out so I could loosen my muscles and stretch them out but my muscles are still very tight and sore. I am getting ready to take a cold water bath (helps with swelling and lactic acid buildup) and some Motrin and crawl into bed. Hopefully, I will be able to move better tomorrow:)

Wiped Out

It has been a long week and sadly, all my weeks are like this at least until May. It will get worse before it gets better. Between work, my internship and taking 2 classes, I barely have time for much else. I try and work out at least 4-5 times a week mainly to give me energy to get through my long days but also to keep my stress levels in check. On top of everything, I still need to sleep, eat, keep the household running, spend time with friends and family, study for my Comprehensive and Certified Health Education Specialist exams and find a job...WHEW, I get tired just thinking about it! BUT GRADUATION is only 13 weeks away!!!! That is not very long and the time will fly by (hopefully). April is going to be a crazy month and I will be MIA for the entire month trying to finish up everything and get ready to go back to work in the 'real' world.
I know this will all be worth it in the end (at least that is what I keep telling myself)!

As for this week, it is almost over and I cannot wait to go home and lounge on the couch:)